and i've been wondering 'bout that change.

*sigh* sometimes i find myself envious of other peoples lives. it's like they have it all together. it's like everything is set, lovely, and strangely in their control.

now deep down i know none of that is true. they don't. they have shit happen. they have struggles, frustrations, pressures, fears, concerns, loss, anger and sadness.

and they def. have no control, for lets face it: none of us do.

but man sometimes i just wish that maybe i could live their life for one day. see what it was like. ironically it would probably leave me rushing back into my own skin. maybe today i just feel unnerved in my own skin.

hm. i don't know. it's also interesting that the people i typically envy i don't even know. they are really but strangers or acquaintances at most. so in truth i don't even know them enough to know their humanness. which is probably why their lives seem so perfect, fascinating, and untouchable.

i love how i am self-analyzing myself on here. ha. just another glimpse into my inner psyche via my blog. yep, i am indeed human, and yes, i am indeed being a selfish little girl right now.