exhausted & reflective.

marion, IN is not exactly a golden place for opportunity in the working world. it has some of the highest unemployment in the entire state. it's a small town, with a lot of factory workers...and not much else.

although indianapolis is only 1 1/2 hours a way, i just found myself with no desire to get a job with such a long commute, esp. since i have no idea what i really want to do with my life.

so, not only are finding jobs tough in the current state of our country's economy, or the fact that i live in a small town, but i also don't know what i want to be doing.

originally when we moved here in july, i tried to find a job on campus, but there were really no open doors whatsoever. so i got a job at the tiny "mall" that marion had. it was a store called maurices and i worked as a sales associate and it was okay. i worked with really nice women but ultimately i worked there for only about 2 1/2 months. evening and weekends were the days i worked, which sucked because that was the time i got to spend time with debo and students. so for the little pay i made, and with the crappy hours and times i had to work it just wasn't worth it. i talked to debo and he agreed. and then for a while i wasn't doing anything...which drove me crazy.

finally, God opened up a small door. it's not this amazing career, or something i want to do for the rest of my life. but He opened a door none the less that gave me a chance to make a little money and do something with my days. what do i do, you ask? well, i babysit. two little ones, a girl named ellie who is 3 and a little boy named keegan who is 1. they keep me super busy and are teaching me a ton about children in general since i didn't have a lot of babysitting experience prior to this. they are the children of another RD on campus, who originally was having various college students watch her kids during the day while she had to work. now that she has me she has a full time sitter (i watch the kids from 9am to 4:30-5pm) during the week.

i will tell you this. it's exhausting. i give kudos to all parents.

i am glad that it's friday and as i sit on the couch watching TLC and typing this i just feel so thankful. i'm glad to be doing something. no it's not my ideal, it's not what i'm going to do forever, but for now its my life, it's good, and i don't mind taking it one day at a time.